Lets Talk Boys

Hey guys, so I wanted to talk a little bit about boys! Not men BOYS!

So its safe to say I have been through enough Fuck boys and situationships to last a lifetime !

Now I know that there are so many of you going through the same thing, and I just wanted to say that your not alone, and don't ever think you're the only one in the entire world that is going through this because trust me it happens all the time ! 

There are literally millions of other girls are feeling the same things you are feeling .

THE SITUATIONSHIP 

So the first thing that I would like to start off with the ultimate... Situationship. This is where you are kinda dating kinda not and the lines between being in a relationship and being fuck buddies are kinda blurred, and of course your starting to catch them feels... 

Now a situationship can last for various amounts of time... so 3 years to 3 weeks, and just because you haven't put a label on it does not mean your feelings are less valid ! 

So please don't think oh my gosh we're not actually together anyway I  shouldn't be feeling this way. But you know what gal? You can't help your feelings, I can't speak on my behalf but I have have friends that have been in a situation, where they were with this guy and they were practically together and it was never official, but when they did part ways it didn't hurt any less than if they were actually boyfriend or girlfriend. 

So if you are feeling as though you shouldn't be feeling a certain type of way about going your separate ways, its okay to feel a bit shit you and your feelings are not any less valid then a couple that was together and broken up !

HOW TO OVERCOME THIS ! 

I think the best way to overcome something like this to have the good old out of sight out of mind. If you don't look at their social media, and don't keep on watching their every move on snap.

 Deleting them off of everything it just helps so so much, they somewhat kinda fizzles out of your head, and you stop thinking about this person a lot less. As it is never going to make you feel good knowing that this person is just going about their day, and not really caring about the fact that yous two are no longer seeing each other anymore, and especially if they have got someone new ! Trust me gal I have been there ! 

So just get rid! get rid of all the photos all the text messages delete the number trust me you will thank me in the long run. 

Now when you come out of this sort of situation, a lot of people tend to think this was just a waste of time. Please do not think of this in that way think of it as; This has happened for a reason, and what lessons can I take away from that. Now it may not seem to make sense at that point in time but a couple of months down the line, it all just clicks in your head. So please just trust the process, and you will be forever grateful. Because the people that you meet in your life help you along your path and help you with YOUR self discovery. 

HOW TO GET RID OF A TOXIC BOY 

The best way to do this is to just sit back and evaluate, take out the whole feelings side and evaluate the whole situation, because at the end of the day this is your life and you do not need toxic boys around you! Does he elevate you ? Does he make you feel good a majority of the time because I know toxic and fuck boys, always manage to spin it round and put it onto you and make, you think that you're the reason as to why your upset when in actual fact it was him! 

Just get rid because you do not need this negative energy in your life! Remember you are your first best friend, and you wouldn't let your best friend keep going back to this toxic boy!

 SO YOU SHOULDN'T EITHER !

HOW TO GET THAT SPARK BACK

If you have been with your significant other for multiple years, and it somewhat feels as though your in a rut, the way that I find to kinda keep both you and your boyfriend on your toes is to set up a cute little couple of dates, and actually say its a date not " do you wanna go for a drink" say " do you want to go on a date to ..." and actually plan it and make it really fancy and dress up, go and get your hair done your, your nails, get some bomb lashes and just look fit AF, and I also find getting ready separately and actually meeting somewhere like a station or something, it really kind of brings back those first date butterflies and oh my gosh it just works a treat. 

CAN LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS WORK 

I would say that long distant relationships can work however it only depends on how much time and effort both of you are willing to put in, you can make things work no matter what if you are both 100% serious about each other also could you see yourself actually being with this person in the long run and if you know you aren't putting in that effort or vice versa.. it just kinda makes it clear weather or not that you are the right people for each other. 

YOU LOVE HIM BUT NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM  

So I have seen multiple people be like this and within a relationship, where they have fallen out of love with their boyfriend or girlfriend. And if its not a mutual thing it can be one of the most heartbreaking things to witness, and when you're in this situation it is probably the hardest things to do because you still love and care for that person so much, you just stay because you don't want to upset his feelings etc.. But if you have fallen out of love with him you just have to break it off as quickly as you possibly can because, you have to put yourself first, and I know this is easier said than done but your not gonna waste 5 years of your time being in a relationship that your not happy in. 

So that is it for my boy talk blog, I hope you liked this little read and it is something a bit different and I will see you guys on Monday 

Deneesha xo